Thanksgiving With A Heavy Heart
Over the past several days I have thought about how I was supposed to spend this Thanksgiving. Does God actually expect for me to give thanks for the things that have happened in my life this year? There were days that I thought..... Surely I should be let off the hook (at least for this year). As I searched my heart for the answer, I was reminded of a letter I received from an old classmate. He spoke of the trials and tribulations that Job went through in the old testament, and the scripture that he spoke of was Job 23:10. It says.... But he knoweth the way that I take; when he hath tried me, I shall come forth as gold. I have taken that as my life verse, because I believe that through this trial I can choose to either be made stronger or I can choose to give up and let life take it's miserable toll on me. So today, (even though my heart is so heavy) I thought I would be thankful for all that I still have, but more importantly the special time that I had with Zachary. I am so thankful that one day soon we will be reunited for eternity. I am so blessed by reading everyones comments, and to see that Zachary's life can still have such an impact on people.
Vicki (MOM)
22:51:18 on 11/22/07
by vicki -
General
Comments
On Thanksgiving Day the family came over to our house for dinner. They all got to see our brand new (5 day old) litter of puppies. These puppies are bittersweet for me because the very last thing Zachary ever said to me was, "Has Sheba had puppies YET?" Frequently when I look at the puppies, I hear his voice saying those words to me, and I want to tell him, "Yes, Zachy, come and see."
Somedays I feel like things are so much harder and not getting easier. I miss you so much Zachary. Somedays I feel strong and I write things that are so positive and encouraging. I guess I am trying to seem strong and encouraging to everyone else. Today I can't stop the tears from coming. As we prepare for Christmas it is just not the same. All the adds on TV get to me. The decorations in the stores make me sad and not cheerful. The thought of buying and giving gifts is not exciting because you were always at the top of my Christmas list. I know all the things that you would have asked for, and I can't give them to you. It breaks my heart, and just doesn't seem fair. I came across your old letters to Santa and they made me cry. I remember the little white tree that we put up with all the blue decorations that you loved so much (with the blue lights), and how we saved it when we moved here. You were going to put it up in your room. Katelyn and I want to put it up on the hill this year so that everyone that drives by can see it. I am going to figure out a way to get power out there so that it will be lit up bright and you can see it from heaven. Please God give Zachary a hug and a kiss and let him know how much we miss him.
Mom
Thanksgiving morning the family came to the house for breakfast since Mamma was in town. We all ate in the kitchen and then Jacob, Brandon, Luke and Nikolas went out back with the dogs to play. I could almost see you sitting on the roof of the doghouse.You liked to climb up there and just sit. I took Mamma out to visit you. We really missed you. It just seemed like you should be out in the yard with everyone else. We went to Aunt Cathy's later that day, and you would have had a blast seeing the puppies and building the bonfire. We miss you. This year is not what we thought it would be without you. Always know how much we all love you and miss you. Mamom
On Thanksgiving Day the family came over to our house for dinner. They all got to see our brand new (5 day old) litter of puppies. These puppies are bittersweet for me because the very last thing Zachary ever said to me was, "Has Sheba had puppies YET?" Frequently when I look at the puppies, I hear his voice saying those words to me, and I want to tell him, "Yes, Zachy, come and see."